, drought, wildfire, laker victories, even alien invasions, but this is the big one, folks. increased traffic on two off-peak days. you know what that means, someone might have to walk someplace. [laughter] think of the children. pray for them. i certainly hope los angeles survives because i've got to be out in l.a. or the big angel, as they say, in just a couple months. i don't want to but it's business because this morning i got nominated for an emmy. [cheering and applause] yep. yes. this is what they look like in person. [audience chanting "stephen"] yes. [cheering and applause] i see these people on the red carpet. now i've already got two for the show, so this could possibly lead to an emmy three-way. see. they're all girls. i checked. [laughter] now, "the report" is nominated for best directing, best writing and best late night show. unbelievably we were once again snubbed for outstanding achievement in prosthetic make-up. people just don't realize that under this i'm like admiral ackbar. [laughter] but for the first time, i was nominated twice in the same category, first for "